Welcome Back World Wide Web

We did it.

We survived almost two weeks with no Internet.

It was touch and go for a few days there. I wasn't sure I could hold out much longer, or that the so called love of my life would be able to survive my constant comments and texts every time I had need of our non-existent wireless.

(I am not bitchy, really. It just sounds that way sometimes when I talk.)

But we did it.

In hind sight, maybe it wasn't so bad...

The kids crawled out of their rooms, bleary eyed and confused at what else the world might hold beyond laptops and iPods.

We read more books.

We played Aggravation.

 (the board game not the emotion)

We all bought bikes.

I finally wrote an ending to Tango which some people have been nagging me about for weeks... maybe longer.

And yes, I even resorted to doing some laundry...

though I don't know why I bothered...

it already needs doing again.

But not a day went by that I didn't start a task only to realize (and quickly point it out to the so-called love of my life) that it couldn't be done without the use of a little piece of techno-magic called the Internet.

I doubt I will ever fully grasp the concept of how it all works... how the entire world can reside at my fingertips for the using, but I know for sure that I never want to live without it.

Living Without Internet

Dear Diary,
Day 10

It has been ten days since my husband, the so called love of my life, lost his temper with the dear folks at AT&T and cancelled our service.
All of it.
(except cell phones)
(thank God for cell phones)

Now, I know that having things like laptops and high speed DSL is something of a luxury, I suppose, but it's a luxury I've come to rely on like having teeth.
Maybe that's a bad analogy...
I'll try again.
It's a luxury I've come to rely on like bread and water.
(except I don't eat bread since it has gluten)
It's like water, ok? Let's just say it's like water!

It's the first thing I grab in the morning and the last thing I need at night. I use it all day long for things both pleasure and mandatory. So many things it has never occurred to me to count. In fact, I never realized just how many things in my household depend on it, from my printer to my kids school lunches.
(just to be clear... my printer does not use water only wireless service evidently)

I keep telling myself that this is just temporary. That someday soon the so called love of my life will choose a new Internet provider and they will come out to the house to restore my faith in all things holy, but right now... I'm not feeling the love, if you know what I mean.
And I hope you do, because I'm not entirely sure what I meant by that.
I just know that life without water is pretty dry.

So, a warning to you all... The next time you are having problems with your home phone and Internet service and are forced to call that never ending help line of automated menus and elevator music hold lines for more than two hours of run-arounds and blank apologies... please think twice before losing your temper. Have a glass of wine, take a Valium, whatever it takes, just don't get mad and cancel the service without a new provider ready in its place!

Ok, that's all I have to ramble about for now. I'm off to do non-internet based tasks like hand washing my sweaters in the river and re-grouting the tile around my kitchen sink...
Not that I'm bitter.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Teenage drinking is like head lice

Ok, so it isn't the prettiest title, but it has to score points for honesty.

 Some people will never have to deal with it, some are shocked to find it in their own home, and for some it becomes a real problem.

As for me, I haven't had to deal with it yet as a parent. I know that some day it might find it's way to my children, but for now I'm just happy to pretend it's not out there.

As long as we're talking about honesty, the only time I give it much thought is when I'm writing about it.

(Teenage drinking that is, not head lice.)

Or watching a show where it seems to be thrown around in a gratuitous fashion.

If you've ever seen Gossip Girl, it seems any sixteen year old with a personal shopper and a fabulous hairstyle will be served martinis everytime they walk into a bar...

  

or a party...

 

or a limo...

Ok, I guess those are glasses of scotch, not martinis, but still.

And teen drinking certainly isn't sequestered to the obscenely rich.

One of my other favorite shows, Vampire Diaries, is littered with beer slinging field parties.

(I'm not sure if they are actually called field parties, but that's what we called them growing up in Vermont.)

Not that I ever went.

Or drank warm beer while the idiot boys tried to impress us by jumping through the bonfire.

Ahem - anyway the only thing these t.v. teens do more than drink and shop,

(or come back from the dead if we're talking about Vampire Diaries)

is have sex.

(now that is a whole other blog)

So why is it that I feel bad when my characters drink?

Maybe it's just the mom in me, the idea that I might be condoning it to my daughters and their friends that in a few years they can throw on a Valentino and kick back a few too many martinis...

Or maybe it's the daughter in me, afraid to admit that I am able to describe the effects so accurately...

Or maybe I'm just afraid that someone, someday, might read one of my books and come knocking on my door to blame me for malinfluencing (did I just make that word up?) their sixteen year old...

Of course if that ever happens I could always fling a martinini into their hand and invite them in for an episode of Gossip Girl.

Unless it was Thursday, in which case I would offer tham a beer (laced with vervain) and kick back for some hot, brooding, vampire action.

But whatever the reason, I do feel bad when my characters use fake i.d.s or red solo cups.

Not bad enough to rewrite the scene, obviously, but bad none the less.

 I suppose that's why, in my writing, it usually comes along with something bad. 

I wonder if the writers of GG or VD (yikes - that is not the best title for an akronym.) ever worried about their influence on over-privileged Manhatten-spawn and the field loving fang crowd...   

If Amanda Hocking can do it, why can't I?

For the past six months, as I prepared my first attempt at ePublishing, I found my inbox stuffed full of little plugs about this girl...

Amanda Hocking.

It seemed every time I checked my mail there was a message telling me to check her out... look at her blog... read her fabulous new series...

I'll admit, I didn't know who she was and I did my best to ignore her. Partly because I have very little spare time and partly because the person doing all the plugging was my mother.

Hello, Jealousy...?

Check ME out... look at MY blog... read MY books!

Ahem - anyway - It wasn't until I finally got my Nook book up and running and sat back thinking now what? that I took the time to put my big-girl pants on, scroll back, and finally click on all those little links my mother sent me and... holy macaroni, oh my God, wow, this girl has got it going on!

She went from Nobody-epublishing-her-own-book to Multi-million-dollar-books-in-print-movie-talks-sensation in roughly four years!

(Ok I think that calls for another exclamation point...)

 !

 (Thank you for understanding.)

She has done it.

She has lived my dream as a reality. 

She has done it well, and she has done it on her own. 

So, now I sit back and think, why can't I?

I'm sure hundreds... maybe thousands... of aspiring authors out there are thinking the same thing, but you see Amanda hocking and I have a lot in common. 

What, you may ask? Well... um... we are both from small towns.

Yup.

Ok, sure, the town she comes from is famous for creating Spam (the meat not the mail) but the town I grew up in, Chester VT, is famous for something, too.

What, you may ask?

 Um... well... we have a village, and we call it the Stone Village.

All right, I'm not sure if that counts as famous, but there is a postcard.

Yessiree, a postcard.

And....... I have eaten Spam (the meat not the mail) and I even kind of liked it.

Honest.

So there you go. Practically twins. I mean for all we know we could have been Switched at birth. 

(Haha, get it? Switched her novel? Yeah, I'm sorry)

But seriously, I find great inspiration in the fact that this woman was able to take something she loved and with her own hard work, dedication, and positive determination turned it into a dream come true.

Ok, I'll say it... MY dream! But if she can do it, so can I. Right?

Right.

Thank you, Amanda Hocking for giving me hope.